tozer.

"always life stands beyond death and beckons the man who is sick of himself to come and know the life more abundant"

i am on the verge of praying some very scary things.  you know, like when you ask god to break your heart for what breaks his.  god will answer that.  i would liken it to asking someone to drop an anvil on your head.  it is certain death.  but in this case...a good death.  i want to die to myself.  i want to live the abudant life, without myself to get in the way.  i want to know the meaning of being hidden with christ. 

i was talking to my bff yesterday and said "today was a great day" and she pointed out that i often say that.  its true.  my life is incredible.  i am really seeing that god truly is able to do far more abundantly than all we can ask or think.  i often can't believe it.  the thing is, i feel like i've cried more in CA that i have in a long time.  but the tears are different.  the tears i cried in charlotte were those of sorrow, pain, bitterness.  here, they truly are tears of joy as i begin to see victories over sin, as i watch myself falling more in love with jesus.  i'm just so thankful.  so, so thankful.  

also, i get to see my family in 4 days.  for the first time in 6 years, this thought excites me.  

the end.